I think I need new friends. When I say ‘new friends’ I actually mean I need friends. I don’t have friends. Like none. Seriously. I don’t have friends. Okay, I have a few. Which isn’t a bad thing because I am not a likable person. I tune people out and when a female comes to me with an issue with something, I tend to just nod say, “oh, yeah. I understand.” I don’t. I don’t understand. You women are complicated. Friendships are complicated. This is why I don’t have many friends and stick to being a loser loner. I don’t want this to become another rules to being my wife. I think I covered mostly everything but I am sure down the road I will think of something else and I will add more fuel to the fire when I degrade women. I am going to let you decide for yourself if you are awesome enough to be my friend.

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