09/11/14

When Deers Attack.

There a many things people worry about when driving. We have bad drivers, drunk drivers, construction, and we have deers. Those pesky animals find it okay to wander into the road and when you’re just trying to make it to work or your daughter’s dance recital, they gallop in your way. If you are lucky enough, you’ll avoid them and avoid having to pick deer fur and flesh from the grill of your car but if you’re not so lucky, you’ll be dealing with more than just that. Those effer’s will turn your high dollar toy into a piece of twisted metal. Maybe a bit extreme. I have been lucky enough to not have that happen to me. I did have a run in with a deer once. It knocked off my passenger mirror. It left me a bit shaken. I am sure the deer felt the same.

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12/29/12

The Department of Motor Vehicles: Part I

I had to get my tags replaced on my car today. I was hoping I didn’t have to do since my tags expired this month of the year 2012. I was hoping the Mayan’s prediction would come true so I wouldn’t have to sit, wait, and deal with the happiest people ever. But they were wrong. The world didn’t end. No zombies appeared. No asteroid came crashing into our planet, and there weren’t any natural disasters to end life on Earth. With the world still going on, I decided it would be best to get new tags on my car. I’ll need to drive with legal tags and not have the constant fear wondering if the police will pull me over for tags that ended on what should have been the end of all humanity. With the fear of the law in my head and the disappointed of no zombies, I hopped in my POS car and headed off to get the tags and to have the relief that I am a law-abiding citizen with tags that are legal and up to date.

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09/20/11

Stick a fork in me, I’m done: Part II

If you read the previous post, thank you. You did miss quite a lot about the happenings and as to why I am switching stores. The last post was a tad harsh. I seemed very bitter and a little off putting. I am sorry if I came across as being that type of person.  I didn’t want to create a post where I gave my previous employer a savage beating. I just wrote and let the words flow. I sometimes have no idea what I am typing. I just let the words come to me and after I get finished with whatever it was that I did write, I question it. I think to myself, “did I really just say all that?” I do hope that the next parts do not sway back to be full of pessimistic views but try to be a little more positive. Make this and the next entry a little more upbeat. Believe me when I tell you that I am not that kind of person. He’s to a half full kind of post!

If you want to read the first entry in this trilogy, click this link right here. It’s lengthy. Almost as long as my entire work span at that location. I can give you a quick run down if you choose to not read it. Summing up that post, I basically give a pretty detailed vision as to why I decided to leave. I explained how I arrived there, how things went for a while, and finally gave you the current state of panic and hysteria I endured with countless others. I explained the job I applied for. I explained the call, the interview and the waiting process I went through before the call came in and gave me the news that sent me into my own, Sally Field style acceptance speech. Enough of me talking about the previous post. This is a new post about the final week I had.

The week started out fine. It was going to be an easy week. I at least hoped it would be. People half expect when someone is on their final hours of doing a job, they will give no effort and just milk the clock. They will just do as little as possible until the final minute hits. After that, they are done. They are finished and ready to move on to something bigger and better. I took the other approach and worked liked normal. I didn’t slack off. I jokingly told people that I will start my week giving a full 100%. If something bad happens or if something puts me in a crappy mood, I will knock of some percentage. As I said earlier, it was just a joke. It was me being funny. Why on Earth would I do something like that intentionally? If I did this, I will tell you that the final hour was low. When the final hour hit, I was at a 37%. I will get to explaining that later. I don’t want to jump ahead of myself.

It was a strange feeling knowing that this was going to be my final week. Work was normal. There really wasn’t any chaos. All was the same. Normal day to day routines. Nothing really out of the ordinary. Work is a little tight. It feels like we are short staffed but we always make it through. We gripe and worry about things. We wonder if we’ll get the tasks and job done on time. There is no need to worry about anything. We always manage to come through and never have problems. We think we won’t make it but we do. I know that after I leave, the place isn’t going to fall apart. People aren’t going to start falling my lead and act like lemmings. They will move on to the next day as if nothing ever happened. No beat will be skipped. I was a hard worker but everyone, even me and all my super awesomeness can and will be replaced with another body. They will just hire another body to fill the void. According to some, I didn’t do work so hiring a new body will at least get some work completed. God, I wish I was told that I was lazy. I wonder what the hell I did these 6 1/2 years? You mean to tell me they paid me for doing nothing? Suckers.

As the week went on, it was getting more apparent that I was leaving. I had all sorts of mixed emotions. I was happy I was leaving. I am nervous about starting the new store. I was sad with saying good-bye. It’s not like I am leaving town and never to return. No, that’s not the case. My name isn’t Charlie and I don’t ride the MTA. I will return. I am just a hop, skip and a jump away…if it takes you 15 minutes to do all that. The fact of the matter is that I will no longer work with them. I will never be able to partake in some of the hilarious sitcom situations we got ourselves into. Good lord, I am making my departure feel like some failed attempt at an obituary.

With this being the last week, everything I normally took care of was being taken away from me. I wasn’t handing the jobs to them but I was being taken out of the loop. Calls that normally came directly to me went to other people. Not upsetting. I was more bothered by the fact that since I was still there, I should still be fielding those calls. I will be gone in a week. After that, do what you wish. Until then, this is still my responsibility. I will still take it seriously and be sure the job is done correctly and efficiently. No need to treat me like I am already gone. If you want that, just ask. I will gladly pretend like I don’t give to sheets to the wind. This didn’t cause the percentage to drop. The real kicker happened on the last day. That is what dropped it all the way to a lowly, 37%.

The only real depressing moment this week was having to work a full five days. I still had a holiday left over to use up and was hoping to sneak it in and get a nice three days off before I was to tell them all in my friend Amber’s native language, “zai jian”. With the extra day tacked on, that lowered my 100% a little. I could have said no. I could have totally put them in a pickle but I am sucker for work. Like I have said a dozen times before, I always put work first. Even ever I finally did myself a favor to put myself before work, I went back to my old ways and made work my number one priority.

The week wasn’t a crappy one. It was actually a pretty good last week. What really through a wrench in the whole thing was the final day. The final day of work was probably the worst and longest of the week. I had just enjoyed the last two days off and was not looking forward to the last day. I would have loved to have just called in sick and be all, ‘sorry. I just ain’t feeling it today.” But I can’t. I am not leaving the company. I am just switching stores. My final departure and stunt would carry over and put a bad taste in the mouths of the bosses well before I start my new job in a week from today.

It was 4am. I picked up a co-worker and we on the way to work. I noticed my car was acting a tad funny that morning. I know the alignment is off centered. Today it seemed to really be eff’ed up. My car was taking a nose dive to disaster faster than Charlie Sheen ruined his career. It would be only a matter of time before my sweet car craves for  the taste of tiger blood. I was thinking to myself, “this cannot be happening today. This cannot be happening on my last day.” We were not too far from work when the car decided it was gonna give me the mfs. I stopped the car and put on my emergency lights. I stopped in the road to see what could be the reason for this sudden and pretty nerve racking dilemma. What do I see? The front passenger tire was kaput. It was flat. This wasn’t a run to the gas station type of fix. I couldn’t wing it and take a chance going to work. It was dead. Effin’ parrot.

We had a big catering going out that morning and we couldn’t be late. She called the store and got herself a ride there. She started the food while I sat at taco bell and waited for my knight in shining armor to save me. It didn’t take very long. I was having them drop the car off at my job. I thought about it after he dropped the car off and took my for 70 dollars. I should have had it taken to the tire store just down the road. But again, I put work first and felt like I needed to get there as soon as I could. My mother insisted that he would have gladly driven me up to the store if I had them take it to the shop. That would have been nice but the two truck isn’t a taxi service. With my car sitting outside and with me inside working, I only had the car on my mind. It was all I could think about. Even with having 3 pretty big catering going out at the same time, those sat on the back burner. I cared about my car. I worried about poor Nancy. Luckily this ordeal happened a week before I was to start my new job. It would look bad if I called in the first day with car trouble. That would be a major strike and just set in motion years of turmoil and the idea would be planted in the heads of the bosses that I was a poor decision. Am I thinking too much into this? Would they just brush it off and know that this is just a one time thing and I will be back the next day to start fresh.

I had a friend from work come out to help change my tire. I am not very car smart. Honestly, I know very little about cars. I can probably change a tire if I needed to but I pay people to fix my car. That is their job. Let them do it for me. Let them use that degree they got in whatever school they go to for mechanics and make my car run. We he grabbed a jack and started work on it. He lifted up the car and started to take off the tire. The tire wouldn’t budge. It would not come off. A light bulb went off and he scurried back inside with what he claimed to be a solution. I waited for me and was curious as to what idea was brewing in his head. What could he possibly use to rip this tire off? He strolled back to the car with a sledgehammer in hand. Yes, a sledgehammer. Peter Gabriel would be proud. A friend of his came over and also took part in trying to remove the stubborn tire. They whacked the tire a few times but still the tire was being a whoe and wouldn’t move. “Whack it again. Whack it harder.” I giggled. Sue me. I can be pretty juvenile sometimes. I was getting upset. This was sending me into a bit of rage. How can this be the end to what should have been a bittersweet day? God was telling me something. Is this his way of telling me that I shouldn’t leave? Sorry, God. I like you and all but I am still leaving. You will need to smite me before you smite my car.

I left my car there over night. It sucks not having a car. I can’t go anywhere. When you have a car, you’re not too inclined to start driving around just cause you want to. The moment you lose your mode of transportation, you realize how important they are and you crave the need to just get up and go somewhere. Even if you have no place to go, you want to get in the car and just drive. I arrived Monday morning at the store and waited on a second tow truck. I was having him tow my car and its’ flat tire to the shop. I handed him the keys and he turns it.

Nothing. He tries again. The car wouldn’t start. ARE YOU EFFIN’ KIDDING ME!? I have a sneaky suspicion that they first tow company did this. Where would I get an idea like that? Went I got in my car today, I noticed some lights were on. The tow truck driver must have left them on. He knew that I would check them and when I go to retrieve my car the next day, the car wouldn’t start. He knows that I will need another tow. Since I already have their number on hand, I will call them for service. Those greedy, little bastards. Don’t screw with me. Your little ploy fell apart. I figured out your game. Still, the car wouldn’t start. Another slap in the face.  What else can go wrong? This is not what I need. The car doesn’t start, the tire is flat. Oh, did I mention that a second tire was a little low on air and a third had a nail in it? Now, the low tire is an easy fix. The nail had been in there for I don’t know how long. Whatever. I figured I might as well just replace them all and start fresh. If I am starting my job fresh, I should let my car start fresh too. I explained to them what I wanted. They said they would call me back with an estimate and see if I am okay with it. I hand them my keys and head back home. My mother drops me off and what do I notice as I am about to step out? I have no keys to get inside the apartment. I had given them the keys and didn’t think about removing the house keys. I love how life likes to totally eff with you all at one time. When it rains, it pours as they always say.

Without going on and on about the car, I had them fix it all. Even the crap he said could wait till a later date. Why wait? Why take the chance of having an issue down the road when I could have solved it that day? I just arrived home from the shop. I took a nice hit to the bank account. Actually, my sister did but I will be paying her back once the money arrives to me. What a glorious end to my life and employment at that store. If the car didn’t decide to crap out on me, I wouldn’t have been so angry. I would have just shrugged off the hellish week and driven myself home to nurse a beer. I would drink away the sorrows and drink in celebration. Three cheers for me!

Part III is next. It will be a memorable tribute to the fond memories I had while I was there. I will not be able to remember it all but I will do everything I can to talk about some of the stories that still linger deep in my memory. I will miss many of the people I work with. They are a great bunch of people.