Vista Comes With The Internet

I think the below film is loosely based on my mother. I can’t tell you how many times I have to explain to her how to install something, load something, copy/paste/delete files, or even, how to start her computer. She likes to tell me that I should go into the computer business because I can do so many things. I don’t think I am very tech savvy. I learned from other people and sometimes if I wanted to fix something, I’d spend all day fiddling with it till I figured it out.


My brother and I have to write her notes and place it on her desktop, naming the file “READ ME!”. I sometimes go as far as changing her desktop wallpaper to a drawing of an arrow pointing to the file to open. She’ll read it and sometimes she will figure it out and other times, she’ll call me and want me to do it. After we get what we explained in the note done, she’ll ask how to change her wallpaper back to the preinstalled window wallpapers.

My mom still thinks youtube is spelled, “Utube”. Close enough. I was showing her the site, and told her to go to the site. I told her to put in the letter U then stream. She typed in, No, mom. Not verbatim. The only site she knows how to use is Pogo. Sometimes even Pogo confuses her.

When I first got my computer, I knew zero about them. I could turn it on and browse the web. After a few short months, I would fill it up with nonsense. I wanted to clean it and start from scratch. When my friend told me about, “format c:”, I was in heaven. It is my favorite thing in the world. I clean my PC about every 6 months. I can get rid of the crap I don’t want and install the programs I use daily. I can set it up how I want and when 6 months is up, go back and it do it all over again.

In the above film, once the parents get connected to seeing their son on the webcam, the mom starts shouting at him. My mom does that too. “He can’t hear you mom. He can only see you.”

“Call ERIN!” NO! “Call ERIN! MOBILE! YES! NO! CALL ERIN!” Jesus! Just dial the number.

My mom isn’t the only one computer dumb in my family. My younger sister will flip if the internet goes down.

“GREAT! MY COMPUTER IS BROKE. CAN’T GET ONLINE!” It’s not broke. It’s just the internet. It’s down. Maybe she should install windows vista. It comes with the internet already.

Our internet was acting up. We all couldn’t connect. Turns out, it was a simple drive to install. I overlooked it. Spent hours trying to figure it out but never could. So we called time warner. Guy comes over and looks at it. He messes with the modem. The main PC has internet. It’s wired right into the modem. So that always works. I go off the wireless router. So the guy goes to my computer, sits down and looks at it. I already know I have no internet. I am not connected to our WIFI and the icon in the bottom toolbar is 2 computers with a big red x through them. He clicks on IE and a 404 page comes up.

“You’re good. You got internet.”

“Wait? I do?”

“Yeah. Vista comes preloaded with it. You’re fine.”

Windows 7People think Mac’s are the best. But does snow leopard come with the internet? I don’t think so! Thank goodness they decided to add the internet to Windows 7. That download would have killed me if it hadn’t.

My mom likes to call installing programs, downloading. “I downloaded Excel to my computers.” Okay, click it to open. So, she’ll click it. Not once. Not twice. But about 12 times. “She’ll then ask, why do I have all these windows open?”

It’s cause you kept clicking it, mom.  She’ll click a Utube link about four times and they’ll all play.

My mom has come pretty far with her computer. She knows more than she did a year ago. I will give my mom credit for Excel. She is a whiz at that program. I know nothing about excel. I can make a chart and that’s really about it. She can get it to do just about anything.

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