The Michael Wong Show: Part V

If you missed the first part of episode one, click here. You can watch the other parts of the series here, here, and here. It’s hard to decide which episode was better. Though I haven’t posted the second last episode yet, it will be hard for you to judge at the moment. Hopefully, I will have the rest up online within the next few days. After “Special Education Boy” left the stage, Michael Wong took a commercial break. It is hard to believe that a show such as this had many sponsors that actually wanted to be associated with the show.

The only company that did end their contract with the show was Johnson and Johnson. One such sponsor, “Parents Ore Trouble” saw a huge leap in sales and phone calls after the ad aired on television. The support group did gave DARE a run for their money. DARE attendance at schools declined while POT members rose to an astonishing 15 members worldwide. The founder, who wishes to remain anonymous, stated that, “this wasn’t a ploy to knock down the problems with drug use but their way to show that they could make a difference.” I for one am mind-boggled at to what they were actually trying to accomplish with the recreational substances they were promoting. See for yourself. Is this a way to glorify drugs or a anti-drug ad to explain the powerful influences drugs have over people.? You decide.


The commercial that followed caught the attention of every male watching the show. Chances are, the majority of people who watched the show were male. The following pie chart (courtesy of “Pickleman Entertainment Corp”), shows the ratio of male and female viewers of the show. It’s easy to see what audience Michael was aiming for. Sorry, ladies..

Viewers of Michael Wong Show

As I was saying, the below commercial was aimed directly at the male viewers of the show. I cannot count the numbers of prescription drugs ads I see on a daily basis. There are all kinds. If you have an illness, there is something out there to cure it. What I always find humorous, it the number of side effects the drugs will give you. Sure, I might be suffering from depression. If I take this little pill, it helps me. But doing so, I will have to suffer through insomnia, dry mouth, nausea, constipation, headaches, and sudden outburst of rage. Thanks but no thanks. I’d rather stay depressed. I couldn’t find the company that offered the drug. The number when I called it, led me to a gay phone sex line. Today, I do not know if the number is working. I’d rather not find out. The drug was not FDA approved but somehow managed to sell the drug. Did you by chance ordered your bottle of “Huge Sausage”? If so, did it work? Let me know.


When the show returned, Michael gave his viewers his own version of the Top Ten List. This was really what broke the camels back. I mentioned before how a spokesperson from the Letterman show demanded the list to stop.

Many late night talk show hosts make a lasting impressions with a routine they feel as if it is their own. Leno has his Jaywalking. CoCo has his visions of the year 3000. Letterman has his top ten list. The Michael Wong Show had nothing of it’s own. It chose to steal the creation and the uniqueness of the Letterman show, in hopes to ride on the coat-tail of a highly successful and well liked performer. Letterman does not claim himself as the creator of the ‘top ten list’ but his humor and the legacy of the bit has withstood the test of time. I wouldn’t be surprised if Michael Wong walked out on stage with pasty skin and a nine-inch chin. He’s that cheap.- Hans Neekinfukin, 1999

Keeping with a Chinese theme, Michael’s top ten list was “top ten chinese names for america child”. The list was sealed in an envelope and presented to him by Gizmo. It was never said why there was no top ten list during the pilot. The only explanation I have is Michael knew his show needed something more. It was something viewers would look forward to each night. It’s not really hard to see where the idea came from. Wong and his people can deny it all they want but we all know better.


The show ended with a returning guest. Rap sensation, Rap Master Funk Ass P came out with everything he had. He rapped his song “My Sister P” again. Unlike last time, the song was full and unedited. Makes you wonder where the FCC was that night. After the song, Michael chatted with Master P for a fit. Like always, Michael pissed off his guest and was beat the hell up by Rap Master Funk Ass P. Michael left the stage to tend to his wounds. Gizmo took to the center stage and ended the show.

The song is still available here.

My Sister P – Rap Master Funk Ass P.


The lyrics to the song are below. You’re welcome to sing along if you want.

Well I got this girl and I’m doing her doggy-style.

Pounding her hard cause it has been a while.

Laid her out onto the floor,

she wasn’t bad for a two dollar whore.

When I got done,

I slapped her on the ass

and said, “get out (censored) and get out fast”.

I said, “I’m not messing, I got a gun.

Not like a Trekkie it ain’t on stun.”

That dumb slut,

she wouldn’t jet.

I told her…one time is all she get.

So I pulled out my nine

and unloaded the clip.

She fell to the floor

cause the blood made her slip.

Her finale words

she said to me

“hey you (censored), don’t leave me be.”

I rolled my eyes

with no remorse.

And looked at her

still rotting corpse.

That’s the song

of my sister P

and the story how I got the name,

Rap Master P….


Amazing lyrics. I wish there was someone out there who would help discover the meaning to this song. It is easy to see why this song became such the sensation it was. If asked today, Rap Master P denies his roots as a rapper. He has been quoted as saying,

It was a troubled time in my life. The devil had a hold of me. It wasn’t until I found God that I was able to free myself from the clutches of the rap world and all its sin.

Make sure you check back later next week for the last entries in the Michael Song saga. There is only one more show to discuss. Will Michael go out with a bang or will he kamikaze himself? Thanks for reading and before you head out, take the poll.

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