The Cat And The Witch

There once was this really noisy cat living in a perfect, quiet kingdom. The cat would hiss and make all sorts of noises every hour of every day. One day, after hours of hissing and meowing and purring, a witch told the cat that one more sound and he’ll be cursed and never allowed to speak again. The cat laughed and took it as a bluff. He looked at the witch and cleared his throat. He hissed loudly and ran off. But before he got away, the witch cursed the cat.

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Dane Cook: How To Be Unfunny and Famous

I know I am a very funny guy. I also know that I am funnier than the untalented stand up comic(?), Dane Cook. Wow, just like that. I throw it right out there. I would have babbled on some before getting to the point at hand but something of this nature needs to be addressed quickly. I dislike this guy. I really do. I do not see what others do and what appeal he has on the general public. Sure he can tell a knock knock joke and steal a situational comedic joke like Carlos Mencia but telling me how fat my mom is or what other hilarious and untrue circumstances he’s been in doesn’t qualify him as a comedian. Being funny does. That sir is one thing you don’t have.  I’ve been to funerals that were more entertaining than you and the sad thing is, the guest of honor was funnier than you – even with them being in a coffin.

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